Return of the (amateur) blogger. It’s been that long since I blogged that I forgot my password for wordpress. Always the pro. Mind you, blogging aside, I’ll typically go through at least 3 password resets in an average week – my attempts to be security conscious and avoid a 1 password fits all approach doesn’t bode well for my time management. I regularly spend the first two minutes on a website swearing and then trying to find the ‘password reset’ button. So, why the hiatus? What can I say, business has just been so busy, I’ve just not had a minute to document my thoughts. Kidding. The real reason for the hiatus was more world travel. Hey, someone’s got to do it. No weddings this time, but I’ve calculated 40,000 miles and 14 flight in less than 10 weeks. Never mind this ‘Like a boss’ lark, maybe I should start a travel blog. Or a blog comparing the amenity kits on various airlines running long-haul flight because quite frankly I have continued to identify this as an area for notable improvement. What a winner of a blog that would be. I can feel the awards now. Ahem…
So here I am, back home in Sydney – the city which has entirely stolen my heart and which I still get excited flying into – with no other immediate (read: any) trips planned and a renewed enthusiasm for my business and a curiosity about what the second half of the year will bring. And well, there is already some change on the horizon. The immediate horizon being tomorrow, which marks the first day of a new part-time(ish) contract role I have accepted. You may remember in an earlier post, I talked about a ‘buffer’ job. These were Job opportunities which, having left the corporate world, sort of made their way to me & which I’d convinced myself I needed. You might also remember though that none of those jobs felt quite right. In fact many / most felt icky. Instinctively I knew the weren’t right but with my inner critic running the show (fuelled by fear) the convincing myself continued as I sort of entertained the idea of these jobs. The main fear? Yep, you guessed it, always money. I was being pulled in two directions, the brave me yelling “You don’t need those jobs, focus on your dream, IT WILL BE FINE” the scared me yelling “WAAAH, HOW WILL YOU PAY RENT??”
I didn’t get any of those jobs. Why? Well put most simply, it wasn’t meant to be and not getting them was the best thing that could of happened. My business needed me and I needed that time to focus on my business. And, I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I focused on the business and it paid off, as more interior clients came my way and I continued to establish the business, working on all the fun marketing stuff that a marketer really rather enjoys and I feel really proud of where I’m at and of everything I’ve achieved since February. I can actually now say, I have an Interior Design business.
And while things are awesome, I’m really happy and I still can’t quite believe the extent of the amazing opportunities which have come my way since February, I’m going to put it out there, my business isn’t fully supporting me, yet. Yet being the key word here. You’re probably thinking “No wonder, with all those blooming holidays she goes on” But in my heart of hearts, I know it will but there comes a time, when you need to invest in business more to help it grown and what those holidays did were to give me some time to crunch some numbers and do a few sums and figure out what my business needs as a priority to make it a success. And to get those things, one needs some dollar. Remember that song? I need a dollar dollar, a dollar is what I need
(hey hey)…Well I need a dollar dollar, a dollar is what I need (hey hey) …Good luck getting that out your head anytime soon.
So, before leaving for the states, I put it out there that on my return to Sydney I would start looking for some part-time paid work which would support my business in the short-term. That same afternoon I got a call out of the blue about a job.
And this job, this one felt different. This one feels like, for whatever reason, it’s meant to be. And when you can learn to trust yourself with that feeling and know that you (and only you) always know the right thing to do, if you allow yourself the space to let it come, there’s something rather nice in being able to just relax into the ease of it all. Of course I still had moments of ‘is this right?’ ‘what might people think of me taking a job when I’ve said I’m doing my own thing?’ but when you do know it’s right, those ego insecurities disappear as quickly as the mind created them and unlike earlier opportunities I didn’t have to convince myself this one was right, I just know it’s what I have to do. It’s the next part of my adventure.
“Bridge jobs are empowering…they help you build the business of your dreams”
– Marie Forleo
The other thing which I’ve learnt to do in this process is surrender. And by that I mean that rather than try to guess or create illusions as to how it will all play out and then try to steer things one way or another, I’m allowing myself more and more to go with the flow. When I wrote that earlier blog post I probably wrote it from the point of view that I’d decided a buffer job wasn’t for me. I didn’t need one. Full stop. But that’s not so. I need to build my business and I need the funds to do that. Here I am saying the exact opposite. I do need one. It simply wasn’t the right bridge job at the right time. Just because something doesn’t feel right today, it doesn’t mean that it won’t feel right tomorrow or next week. When you’re making up your mind about something it doesn’t need to be forever. Remember, you can always change your mind. Be open to what you feel in the moment. Take each day as it comes. This is definitely something I’ve had to practice but you’ll be surprised by how easy that becomes over time, and that’s coming from someone who always played the future game!
So, here I am a little further down the journey than I was and another new opportunity has presented itself. And in so many ways it’s perfect. It will still allow me to do my internship which I am loving and getting heaps of value out of and it will still allow me to focus on my business. In fact , who knows, maybe with less time each week for my business I’ll actually get more done. What is it they say? “If you want something done, ask a busy person”. The role is also related to interiors and so I hope will bring new connections, both for my business but also new friends. You know from another earlier post that I’ve been missing office banter.
Importantly, what is will also do is provide financial security and time and time again as I chat to people with dreams of starting their own business or who want to embark on a career change, the biggest fear is usually always around making enough money to survive. I can relate. I get it. I did it with no savings and credit card debt but here I am being gifted an opportunity to turn that around. And having a steady income again will allow me to invest in my business and also provide emotional security while I build the business of my dreams.
So, with some money in the bank. I can now pay back all the coffees I owe people and also gain a chance to learn, an opportunity to share, to grow, to make new friends, to maybe even get more done in my business. And well, all of that sounds pretty good to me.
Let’s see what happens next. One things for sure, there will be no more wearing jammies at my desk!